Muddy Waters understood the challenge of rapport building.  In part one of this two-part blog post, I used the iconic Waters’ blues song to illustrate the concept of interactive style schemas and their importance to developing rapport with others.  Identifying the behavioral cues and adjusting your communication approach to others is the cornerstone for success in leadership, sales, and customer service; it is our interpersonal mojo.  In this post, we’ll explore each style more deeply:  Romantics, Warriors, Experts, and Masterminds.

The Romantic possesses an emotionally-oriented schema.  In other words, this style of communicator perceives the emotional content within their environment more acutely, and therefore is more aware of the existence and impact of feelings; feelings are the mojo of the Romantic, if you will.  The Romantic communicator tends to be more diplomatic and tactful when communicating, takes a more personal interest in the life of the other party, and generally enjoys people who they find to be likable.  Likable, of course, would be defined in others as being tactful, diplomatic, and interested in the personal life of the Romantic.  When communicating with a Romantic, it will be important to smile, ask lots of questions, remember their name, and take an interest in them as a unique person – essentially, be a positive contributor to the emotional content of their environment.  Romantics have an intrinsic need for appreciation, so feel free to pile on the praise; just make sure said praise is genuine and sincere.  While there is only a loose correlation between a person’s profession and their interactive style, I think of the stereotypical teacher or social worker as the model for this style.

Warriors are very different from Romantics; a Warrior has a logically-oriented schema.  Logical sensitivity generally results in a desire for efficiency and outcomes.  Getting results is the mojo of the Warrior.  The Warrior tends to be highly productive, bottom line oriented, and uninterested in topics or conversations that do not move the situation toward closure.  They tend to communicate in a direct and expeditious manner.  To build rapport with a Warrior, it would be wise to do the same.  Warriors base rapport on the value of the other person.  If a Warrior identifies that you offer them something of value, they will remain interested in what you have to say – provided, of course, that you say it quickly.  Oh, and give them some space.  Warriors’ intrinsic need is independence.  Stereotypically speaking, the Warrior may be an attorney or an executive at a large company.

Experts are the most thorough of the communication styles.  They are precise and detailed, preferring to talk about things with which they are familiar.  Their schema is sensitive to those elements with which they have a history.  They tend to be reliable and accurate, and are able to talk in great depth and detail about subjects that they know:  their mojo – consistency.  The basis of rapport for an Expert is knowledge.  Experts do not like to feel stupid and will seek out those who can provide them with accurate information about that which concerns them.  Be certain that everything that is shared with an Expert is accurate.  Mistakes and misinformation are not tolerated among the Expert style and their intrinsic need is for security.  Again, speaking only in stereotypes, the Expert may seem akin to an engineer or a contractor.

Finally, we have the Mastermind.  They tend toward the conceptual.  They are often innovative and future oriented, filtering their experiences through a schema dominated by possibilities.  They have an entrepreneurial approach to life, generally seeing policies and procedures as mere guidelines for consideration rather than rigid rules to which they should comply.  Their mojo is variety.  They enjoy new and varied experiences and avoid boredom at all costs.  The intrinsic need of the Mastermind is diversity.  Keeping their options open and the conversation moving in many directions will help strengthen rapport with this style.  As a stereotype, think artist, musician, and marketing professional.

Each of us has a preference for one of the four iconic styles.  It is important to know this about yourself and seek out situations and people who provide you with your intrinsic rewards.  It also important to be attentive to the interactive needs of others so that you can adjust your approach when communicating with them.  By matching your interactive approach to the preferred style of your client, colleague, friend or family member, you will establish quicker and stronger rapport and make the interaction more fulfilling for both of you.  Sure, adjusting your style to meet the needs of another may be a bit exhausting (even a little stressful), but failing to do so would be worse.  Just like in the sentiments of Mr. Morganfield, when your natural style does not work on the person with whom you are communicating, and you fail to adjust, the results can be quite frustrating and potentially damaging.  You risk losing business, creating unsatisfied clients, or hurting personal relationships.

Speaking of personal relationships, don’t be fooled into thinking that we fall in love and marry people with a similar interactive style as our own.  Oh no…nay, nay Nelly!  Many times it is quite the opposite.  For every Romantic who marries a Romantic and Warrior who marries a Warrior there is a Romantic who weds a Warrior.  The ability of two diverse styles to understand and respect the communication approach and intrinsic needs of their partner is critical to the success of the marriage.  That is an article for another time.  Let’s just suffice it to say that Muddy “Mississippi” Waters, who married for the first time at 17, fathered a child at 20 with another woman outside of his marriage, had several kids with a variety of women, and married a 19 year old when he was over 60; may have struggled a bit with this application.  Perhaps that is why the song “Got My Mojo Working” resonated with the man.